Off-topic: TSA

This is slightly off-topic, but aviation related so here goes... Let me preface this by saying that (1) the only thing I ever get anxious about is the possibility of missing a flight and the ensuing challenges, (2) that anxiety is primarily induced because of the random security policies and unpredictable amount of time needed to get through, (3) TSA personnel in general are at least neutral if not friendly during the process, and (4) it's (typically) not their fault that the policies are arbitrary, inconsistent and inconsistently applied.

I took a 3-day weekend to visit a very dear and very pregnant college friend to help her paint the new baby's room and to catch up. The Tampa airport has implemented the new air-puff "security" measure in addition to the baggage screening and metal detectors.

There are a lot of reports out there of people feeling claustrophobic, violated and even harmed when going through these machines. Many people also report that it's only used for random/special passengers. In Tampa, every passenger had to go through it, resulting in a long, slow-moving line.

The worst part for me was the wait and not really knowing what was going on. The attendant TSA fella said it would blow some puffs of air and that I needed to stand still for 22 seconds until the light turned green and the doors opened. I'm fairly small, so no feelings of claustrophobia. The air puffs from this one weren't "hurricane force," as some other poor travellers reported about their experiences. But after the puffs, why the 22-second delay? Why not 5 seconds? What was the whirring noise? And when the attendant called out (more loudly than he had spoken before I stepped into the machine) "Is this your bag?" I turned to see if he was talking to me... You can imagine me grimacing and closing my eyes and apprehensively clenching my fists, waiting for him to pull me out and either make me do it again or be hand searched or something. Luckily, that didn't happen, but there again -- why the instruction to stand still if in fact it didn't matter that I moved?

I can see why these facades really piss people off. Why does GE get to make billions of dollars by inconveniencing commercial passengers with a questionable net effect on security? All in all, I accept the inconvenience and temporary stressors they invent because it's less painful than the alternatives, most of which would include missing my flights. But it still sucks.

Oh, and they confiscated my mascara, too. I suppose the threat of forcibly giving the captain a makeover is just too much.

Private pilot license, here I come!